She's "cured"
I just had such an intense visceral reaction I can hardly find the words. My energy and attention span were flagging and I was considering making coffee, but decided instead to try some of an electrolyte mix that's part of my (as yet untouched) cleanse regime. It's full of natural this-and-that-whatever energy-stuff and it's a pale yellow powder you mix with purified water.
Problem is, I used one of the tall drinking glasses I favoured for... imbibing other stuff... and when I poured the water, the glass filled with a yellow liquid which was EXACTLY THE COLOUR OF WHAT I USED TO DRINK and I had this terrible rush of near-nausea and disgust as though I were pouring an alcoholic beverage. With all of the feelings of guilt, shame, and fear that go with it.
It was like having a 10-second waking nightmare. A flashback, I suppose you'd call it. (UPDATE: "Associative memory" in real psych parlance.)
I could barely lift the glass to my mouth because I almost didn't believe it would taste like lemonade.
But it did.
2 Comment:
I'm still waiting for an epiphany of sorts -like yours -to happen to me with respect to the damned nicotine. Still puffing away. Not quite as much, but still, still doing it. Thankfully, I still have a couple more boxes of the prescription and can also get a refill of it too. Somethings just really do take a hell of a long time to bring us to terms with our addictions, don't they?
Glad your drink did taste like lemonade though. That, to me, would be a bonus right there since I do love lemonade.
Sounds like the smoking dream I had the other night.
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